I am sure you have...when someone looses their closest companion they ALWAYS feel like they lose a soul mate. I have never been so lonely before. I just wish the pain would go away...and I am writing this here because everyone else has read everything before and just tells me I need to get over it. I Gave him my whole heart and didn't even realize it until he tore it to shreds. I know...same old sob story. I am just taking this version of it particularly hard. All I want to do is touch him. And he wants nothing to do with me. He wants someone better, hotter, smarter...It always makes me feel as if I can never be good enough for anyone again.
He made me strong for him...I did so much for him and he kicked me out of his apartment, and threw me back into the put of a home my mother lives in, which my sister moved back into...so now...it's like high school all over again and I hate it. I want to tell myself it's a dream, wake up next to him in our home and tell him what and awful dream I had.
I think I should just disappear for a while. I don't know if it would help, but I think at least I'll forget about him eventually.
I just want this pain to go away.
- Mood:
- Listening to: the refrigerator. humming.
- Reading: Lust lizard of melancholy grove
- Watching: ummmm....nothing.
- Playing: . only two hands.
- Eating: was eating my homemade lasagna earlier.
- Drinking: delicious homemade iced tea.
huuzzaaahh!
